The Comeback (or not)

Hello internet!
I know, I know that I haven't write on this media for a very long time, but that doesn't mean i have forgotten about you, well I guess in some way I did, but just to remind you again that I'm the *technically* busy med student, so yeah, I'm busy. I guess.
anyway, what I'm trying to write here is a little bit about my present condition, the med student in waiting, okay waiting for a new semester to start! was that amazing or amazing? anyway, it was amazing that I'm passing the first year, yes, yes did I tell you that already? I am passing the first year! heck yes. I mean thank God. actually I barely passed, I got a DC (which of course means a big red fail sign hovering above) but then by some strings of miracle, I got a marvelous BB in the final. suffice to say, it was the outstanding for my standard, I mean I barely managed a CC for the whole year.
so, this year, now I am proudly saying I can see a little bit here and there signs of why I was failing. Most of the times were... because I was cursing my life, by my self! I was always regretting the fact that I'm a medstudent, that I'm wasting my family's money... but then I realized... the 'rentals thought that I wanted this, and i guess in some point of my life I did wanted this... so I tried to remind my self of the whys. It wasn't easy and temptation to quit was there in every step of the way. but heck yeah there will always be a temptation along the way. take it as a spice in your soup, you don't want to eat plain cucumber or spinach yogurt soup right? (it was a real soup, mind you)
and then beside that... I guess I was still finding my strategies... did I told you how was my exam system? I'll tell you now, it was messed of to a whole new level. we have an exam in every 1.5 months, with 100 Qs, and from all subjects we studied for that 1.5 months, and it might have been okay if we have some syllabus of some sort but we did NOT, only some angelic lecturers would do that, and some j*rks lecturer will make your life harder to the level of you just want to die and skip those qs *okay I did exaggerated a bit* anyway, beside those messed upness, the scoring system was a b*tch. if in a subject (ex. biochem) there's 16 qs and you got more than half wrong answers, that means your score in that subject will be minus. heck yeah.
so, no random patterning the paper, no it's a no go. i probably got all those Ds from that kind of mistakes.
and yeah, after a very extensively long year *another exaggeration mind you* I finally learned my strategies, which led me to that pretty BB, beautiful baby *corny i know*
so yeah, that's about school...
what about life?
heck, love life?
nope sorry to disappoint, still not going to tie any informal nor formal relationship any soon.
I love my life now *surprise surprise*, I love seeing my peers do stupid inconsequential things that young people *in* love do, and laugh behind their back *okay not really, I swear it was a joke*
talking about this led me to a certain condition, did I tell you about that winter crush? heck yeah, summer crush or fling was a tad bit too mainstream for my liking.
okay okay, I tell you, this crush was... nice to have while it lasted. he was cute, seemingly smart, and most importantly he effing READS. how many cute nice decent guys you know who loves to read? yeah, not lot.
guaranteed, it was a crush, a really nice heart warming cute crush, and most importantly, fun while it lasted.
people, I know any next step will not be happening, especially since he was in a different department, and he never asked my number, or seemingly having intention to, and I'm visiting my the familia this year *tell you details later* so... summer break, no class, no Gaziantep, no signs of his presence... I let it go *cue for Let It Go*
I'll tell you again, I'm still in my principals of ten year (and more) planning, which does not include any relationship, ergo, crush is all there is.
let's move to the next thing then...
I'm visiting Indonesia, yes, heck yeah!
I wasn't planning to go this year, nu uh, but then God gave me this very lovely and amazing present, a friend of mine. she was looking for someone who *her words verbatim* goes home by plane and wants to go home this year.
I mean, home, familia, for free? who can resist it? then... after a little bit of complication in the heart *of the 'rentals* and a tad bit male ego here and there *the Dad's* I received the free tickets to and fro. FREE. TO. AND. FRO.
not gonna tell you how much the tickets worth, which in my mid class life opinion was LOT.
but anyway, I cannot thank you enough for that particular friend. I hope God bless you and your family.

so there's that, I passed the first year *barely*, I'm still happily single and having not intention for anything else *really? way corny qil!*, and I'm visiting my familia this year *cue to the drums*, though due to the current state of indonesia *heck what did I said? current?* I'm really... not in the mood to see the country, not now not ever *I may or may not will tell you more about that later*... sorry guys.

thank you for reading this uninformative, boring, and random post people!
bye!


Aqila